Saturday, March 19, 2011

Would You Like Fries (or Pizza) with That?

Last week Dave and I went on a ski trip with some friends.  Back (in the day) when I was learning to ski, we were taught 'snowplow'


and 'parallel'.


Nowadays, the term 'snowplow' has been replaced with 'pizza'


and 'parallel' has been replaced with 'french fries'.

(But let me just tell you that the cute terminology does not make it any little bit easier.)

I mastered skimmed by on snowplow for a few years, then graduated to a "technique" that is called 'stem christie'.  It sounds like it would be really elegant and cool:


It is not.


During our trip there was a lot of talk amongst the men-folk about the consistent snowfall, leading to "champagne powder'.  The guys were all about going out to "Shred the pow!!!".


I was a little less excited since I'm not yet savvy in The Way of the Pow.


I also discovered another tall order for a short-stop like me on the hill.  Given the fact that I come from a slightly different genetic makeup from Dave,


I am often challenged by the world around me.  And, until I can learn to activate my Go-Go-Gadget legs


I am reduced to this:


AND this:

Which brings us back to skiing.  There was one gondola on the hill that caused me the greatest of discomfort (and nauseating motion sickness).  No matter what I did, I just couldn't get comfy.


Luckily, Dave was there to lend a help hand.


Err, foot.

*Note: While writing this post, I decided to look up the term 'stem christie' to see if it actually exists.  It turns out I had not made it up.  BUT, it also turns out that it is a stance used only to teach *TURNING* and is not meant to be a general purpose posture while screeching down the mountain side (and I think we can all see why).  So, I have been living under that misapprehension for the last 20 years.

UPCOMING POSTS:
MORE ON THE ATHLETIC STANCE
THE SWIM (NOT SWIMSUIT) EDITION

43 comments:

  1. I love your go go gadget legs! I am the worst skiier ever. I struggle on the bunny hills. I fear using the chair lifts bc I think ill plummet to my death lol. So really, youre a pro compared to me ;) ps- I saw your cupcakes on fb, you definitely have a speciality!

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  2. I love your pictures. Wow. They were fun to follow along with the story. I have to find pictures as I can't draw. Those were fun.

    Thank you for stopping by my blog today.

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  3. Meg: They were fun to draw :) I'm afraid of heights so it takes me a while to get used to the chairs...go figure. As for the cupcakes, all borrowed ideas, my dear :) I guess being on fb has its perks...you were the first to comment!

    Bernie: Thanks so much for stopping by! I really enjoy your site so it makes me happy that you came over :)

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  4. OMG Julie, you brought back my YMCA ski lessons I took back in the 1970's with Snowplow, Parallel, and Stem Christie (I did remember it as turning)! And I am so with you on the powder...I could never ski in it. Thanks for the trip down memory lane :D

    Oh, I love your Go Go Gadget Go Go Boots!

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  5. Hahaha, I love you swinging your legs in the chair. Too funny. You really are a talented drawerer, can capture the moment perfectly! I am glad you had a fun time skiing with the fams :)

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  6. Ohh skiing.
    I haven't skiied in YEARS. Probably because of the many things you have mentioned ;)
    But I started when I was three (on a leash, of course) and continued on until I was 13, so I think it may be time one of these years to start up again.
    Also - I'm short too. I feel your pain!

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  7. Ann: You're welcome! And I'm glad you got the boots reference :P

    TexaGermaNadian: Thanks! It was a lot of fun!

    Daisy: There were two 3 year olds on our trip (not our kids) who went to ski school! Life's tough for us shorties sometimes, isn't it?

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  8. hilarious post... as always - I just can't get enough of it, you really make me giggle!! I'm glad you had your fun this weekend... I gave up on skiing and decided for snowboarding instead. Who knows how that turns out...!

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  9. LOL just came across your blog from FTLOB... I just did a post about my first snowboarding experience aka epic fail.. check it out when you get a chance! http://graphicdesignconfessions.blogspot.com

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  10. ba ha ha h ah ah ah aha! i loved your cartoon ski trip how fun! your so funny!!
    found you on FTLOB!
    Hugs & Loves, Ariel

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  11. Lol these pics were funny! Found you on FTLOB! Just spreading the love!
    -tiffanie

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  12. love the pics of us...glad you didn't mention the problem I encountered visiting the cottage :)

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  13. Katherina: That's so nice of you! Snowboarding, eh? You're much braver than I!

    Kristen: Thanks for visiting!

    Ariel: Thanks for that!

    Tiffanie: Thanks for the comment and for spreading the love!

    Mom: Glad you like it...and I certainly thought about it but there would be too much explaining involved :D

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  14. omg why do illustrations make blog posts so much more interesting?? I wish I could draw! Love it!!

    Thanks for stopping by my blog today!! Have a great night!

    Oh, and I pretty much look like that skiing too. Glad to know I'm not the only shortie on the lifts!

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  15. Thanks Kari!! And I figured you might already know about Smodcast, but on the off chance you didn't I wanted to make sure you were covered on all your Kevin Smith fronts :D

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  16. This is one of the most hilarious things I can remember seeing in a long time! Thanks for stopping by my cooking blog. Following here now!

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  17. Thanks so much Michelle! Glad you're here :D

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  18. Can I say (yet again) how much I love the drawings!! Maybe it's the whole kid in me loving picture books, but it's just so unique. Love it!!

    And I grew up with the snowplow and parallel. It goes to show you how greasy food-oriented we are nowadays that pizza wins out over snowplow and who knows how many kids know what "parallel" means (I semi-don't want to know the answer out of fear).

    Glad you're still giving skiing a try. Maybe snowboarding next time around. I'm still getting the hang of it, but certain aspects sure are easier to pick up.

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  19. Thanks Kurt! You're very kind! I never thought about the fact that the technique names are basically junk food names.

    As for snowboarding...not bloody likely :)

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  20. I am following you through the blog hop. Please return the follow at http://thecryptocapersseries.blogspot.com
    www.reneeahand.com
    Thanks!
    Renee

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  21. New gfc follower. If you get a chance visit my blog at www.mommywantstoread.blogspot.com

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  22. Love the drawings. I love to ski and these made me smile! Have a great Tuesday!!!!

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  23. This is such a cute post. I just found your blog and am so glad I did!!

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  24. Renee and MommyWantsToRead: Thanks for joining! I look forward to checking out your sites.

    Hope: Glad I could make you smile!!

    Alicia: I'm glad you found it too!

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  25. I think I love you. bahaha! How have I never stumbled upon your blog before? so much fun! I heart the foodie terminology for your skiing and you're super duper go go gadget leg action (I desperately want that too! I'm a lil one!)

    Fabulous blog! lets be bffs mmk?

    xoXOxo
    Jenn @ Peas & Crayons

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  26. Thanks Jennifer! Hooray for new bloggy friends!!

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  27. That's so funny they call it pizza and french fries now! I ski like you do...but horray for a trip!

    I'm awarding you the Stylish Blogger Award!!! I love reading your blog on a daily basis. If you want to accept the award and forward it on to another blogger, visit me and grab it!!

    :)
    Marcy @ Life's Gristle

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  28. All of the illustrations are great! Pizza and fries really does make sense other then they make you hungry, haha. The visuals make even better! Sounds like you had a good time besides the motion sickness. Have a great week! ♥ BJ

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  29. I stopped skiing years ago because I did not like it enough to go through the effort (renting equip. driving up the mountain, buying the lift ticket...).

    But I will drive to another city, stay in hotel, wake up in the dark....for a race. Go figure.

    Happy triing,

    elena

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  30. Thanks for the comment! I love your illustrations! Super creative. I've never gone skiing and would be too scared to even Try maybe one day

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  31. Marcy: Yeah, I don't know when they changed it but I guess maybe it's more kid-friendly now? Thanks so much for the stylish blogger award! I will *definitely* try to pay it forward :D

    Bobbi: Thanks! Yeah, maybe the food terminology is to get you to buy more food at the lodge!

    Elena: I think the difference is how cumbersome (and expensive) skiing can be compared to running. For this trip I didn't have to drive every day and i have my own equipment!

    kyari: Thanks for coming by! skiing is actually pretty fun, as long as you don't go beyond your comfort zone :)

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  32. Hi there, thanks for visiting my little corner of BlogLand, and sharing your father's journey along this road of detour and rediscovering/recreating one's self. It is inpsiring to read/hear about others who have travelled this road before me... with God's help and on angels wings I too will reach the next turn in the road of life.

    I'm your newest follower .. thanks for the fabulous post above it really made me smile... HHL

    P.S. I noticed you are a Speech-Language Pathologist ... I have been working with mine for the past 4 1/2 years and its because of her dedication that I'm writing today. SLP make a difference..

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  33. Hi HHL. I'm so glad you stopped by! I have to tell you that I am really impressed you've been getting speech tx for 4.5 years! I bet she would say that it is *your* dedication that got you to where you are today...after all, she could have the best goals for you but they would be useless if you didn't work on them every day :)

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  34. Hey there,
    I'm tagging you to participate in the ask me anything game :) I hope you will "play along" :)
    http://sweetenedbykagi.blogspot.com/2011/03/ask-me-anything.html

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  35. Oh yes, the pizza...it always hurt my knees. I was never a good skier.

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  36. 5 Miles 2 Empty: Yeah, it's tough...especially if you're going over moguls ;)

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  37. Just found your blog tonight at FTLOB and it is so fun! Love your illustrations! I have never even tried to ski... Too scary for me lol

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  38. Thanks for the smile. Loving the pictures and descriptions. Following you from the hop. Hope you'll come visit. http://hisperfectpromises.blogspot.com/

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  39. Branson: thanks for coming by! i certainly feel that way about plenty of things :)

    Tamara: thanks! Gotta love blog hopping!!

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